Pisces Are Twice As Nisces
(06.05.2003 - 6:54 p.m.)

One for the programmers amongst you:

How To Shoot Yourself In The Foot, In 13 Programming Languages

C: You shoot yourself in the foot.

C++: You accidentally create a dozen instances of yourself and shoot them all in the foot. Providing emergency medical assistance is impossible. You can�t tell which are bitwise copies and which are just pointing at others and saying �That�s me over there!�

Modula 2: After realising you can�t actually accomplish anything in this language you shoot yourself in the head!

DOS: You finally found the gun but can�t locate the file with the foot in for the life of you.

Ada: If your dumb enough to actually use this language, the united states defence department will kidnap you, round you up and tell the soldiers �Shoot at their feet.�

APL: You hear a gunshot and there�s a hole in your foot, but you don�t remember enough linear algebra to understand what happened.

Assembly: You crash the OS and overwrite the root disk. The system administrator arrives and shoots you in the foot. After a moment of contemplation the system administrator shoots himself in the foot and then hops around the room rabidly shooting everyone in sight.

dBase: You squeeze the trigger but the bullet moves so slowly that by the time your foot feels the pain you�ve forgotten why you shot yourself anyway.

Basic: Shoot yourself in the foot with a water pistol. On bigger systems continue until the entire lower body is waterlogged.

Visual Basic: You�ll shoot yourself in the foot but have so much fun doing it you won�t care.

Pascal: The compiler that won�t let you shoot yourself in the foot.

Unix: %isfoot.cfoot.hfoot.0toe.o%rm:.O: no such file or directory.is foot.

SQL: you cut off your foot, send it out to a service bureau and when it returns it has a hole in it and will no longer fit to the attachment at the end of your leg.

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