(2002-08-23 - 5:53 p.m.)
Why is life so fucking whacked? It's like I'm being taunted. Or is it just that I don't appreciate the things I have for what they are?
Sometimes something will enter my life that is incredible. But I'm never satisfied. I always want to take it that one step further; see where it leads me. And when I can't take it to that next stage, I get frustrated and angry.
You'd think I would've learned by now. Apparently I haven't.
* * * * *
We conducted the funeral of a 33 year old woman today. I think it might have been the first time that I have been really, truly moved by a funeral that I have attended through work.
We shouldered the coffin into church and her young children and her husband were walking behind us. I could hear him talking to them as they cried, trying to give them some hope, some support, some guidance.
I wanted to tell him that he was doing a fantastic job. I wanted to tell his kids that somehow they will go on. I wanted to help them do something useful with all that pain.
But there aren't any words are there? Sometimes silence is more meaningful.
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