Some Are Born Great
(03.02.2003 - 3:04 p.m.)

Will someone please explain why I am typing an entry in my diary, when what I should be doing is something constructive towards getting a job. Something like writing letters and resumes, scouring the paper for vacancies or making phonecalls. Not writing piles of waffle in here!

The truth is that I like writing in here. It provides escapism. It gives me a chance to splurge my thoughts out onto the metaphorical page. And, for the most part, I know that when you guys leave me notes, it won't be along the lines of "Get a fucking job you lazy-ass piece of shit!" Even though some of you may be thinking it.

So, ultimately, what I need is for someone to pay me for writing my diary here at Diaryland. It might happen. "Sha! Right! And monkeys might fly out of my butt!"

oOo oOo oOo

Something that tends to bug me, and probably shouldn't, are people who claim to be very artistic, but who only ever absorb the most mainstream of the arts. And whilst I appreciate wholeheartedly that pop-culture and art are not mutually exclusive, if you're going to boast about how sensitive and arty you are, you could at least make the effort to find something that could be considered truly artistic.

For example, if you continually state that you are the eptiome of the sensitive appreciator of music, but only ever listen to Kylie Minogue, I have a problem with that. Don't get me wrong, I too listen to Kylie Minogue, but her music isn't all that artistic. It's great 'get-on-the-dancefloor-and-wiggle-it' music, but art?

And I'm sure that someone else must've noticed that it's always the people who aren't what they say they are that shout the loudest about it. If someone truly is one of the greatest martial arists of our time, they very rarely yak on about it. If someone really is the greatest singer of a generation, you don't often find them boasting about it. There are obviously exceptions, but on the whole, people who are truly great tend to be humble with it.

Thinking about it, I'm sure there is a contradiction there, because I suspect that people who are truly great know that they are. It is probably that very knowledge that makes them appear outwardly humble. Their sense of self brings them a certain self confidence, which in turn means that they don't have to shout from the rooftops.

Or is it different again? Are people who are truly great like that because they doubt themselves and their abilities? Are they great because their doubt causes them to reassess themselves from time to time, bringing them a certain strength?

Or are they just rare individuals? 1000 points of light in the darkest of places?

oOo oOo oOo

The Secret Diary of Samwise Gamgee, Gardener to the Stars.

Day 1: Frodo stabbed by Morgul blade. Oh no! Pippin cried. Told Pippin it would be all right as Mr. Frodo far too hot to die. Did I say that out loud?

Day 3: Have followed Mr. Frodo to Rivendell where Elves will heal him. Gandalf told me to help poor unconscious Mr. Frodo get out of dirty clothes. So took clothes off him and gave him a bath. And another one. Then gave him another bath. Gandalf came and told me six baths was quite enough, Samwise Gamgee. Poncy old git probably hasn't taken a bath since the Second Age.

Day 4: Wonder if it is time for Mr. Frodo to have another bath yet.

Day 5: Elf bubble bath very colorful and pretty. Gandalf no fun at all. *sulk*

Day 6: Mr. Frodo awake! Is doing well although also seems concerned as to why his fingers are all wrinkled. Decided not to tell him about all the baths.

Day 7: Snuck into Council of Elrond. Frodo offered to take Ring to Mordor. Mr. Frodo is so brave, handsome, tall and wonderful! Okay, so possibly isn't all that tall.

Day 8: Off to Mordor. Other members of Fellowship very dodgy if you ask me. Especially Boromir. "Teaching Merry and Pippin how to sword-fight" my Aunt Lobelia. Obviously pervy hobbit-fancier who likes to roll around with small men in shorts.

Day 9: Aragorn just as pervy as Boromir. Obviously fancies Mr. Frodo. Will kill him if he tries anything.

Day 10: Very dark in Mines of Moria. Used flat edge of sword to whack Aragorn every time he tried to pinch Mr. Frodo in the dark. Gandalf fell into bottomless pit. Mr. Frodo said something later about pointy wizard hat, but did not understand it as am innocent young hobbit from Shire not versed in wordily ways. Pippin says Legolas is shagging Gimli. Ick.

Day 15: Lothlorien very pretty. Blonde elf lady absolutely hitting on poor Mr. Frodo left, right and center. Pippin agrees. Told Pippin height difference would make relationship impossible. Pippin said Mr. Frodo could stand on stilts. Hate Pippin.

Day 22: Leaving Lothlorien. Bye-bye grabby elf lady. Not sure where going exactly, but is obviously somewhere water-related, as have been given boats. Do not care really as long as get to share boat with Mr. Frodo.

Day 23: Boromir finally acted on pent-up lust for Mr. Frodo. Got shot down of course (hurrah!) but not before made spectacle of himself. Claims was trying to take Ring so as to rule world and bring down evil, but we all know that's a big fib don't we.

Day 24: Boromir killed by orcs. Knew orcs good for something. Frodo off to Mordor. Taking me along. Hurrah! Mr. Frodo needs cheering up as seems inexplicably sorry to say goodbye to Gimli, as well as is depressed and claims is now sure he will die a virgin in the barren wastelands of the Dark Lord's realm. We will see about that.

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