(17.02.2004 - 8:30 p.m.)
Right now I feel like I'm having to learn how to live all over again. Circumstances change all the time, and each time you have to wake up, brush yourself down, and start from scratch. I feel like I've had a limb severed and am having to learn to cope without it. And I guess there is some kind of loneliness in there. Always the lone wolf. And therein lies the conceit. The contradiction at the very heart of all things. I am in love with the romance of survival. But I don't want to survive. I want to live.
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